Warning: This article deals with suicide. 

Former Warriors prop Kane Evans has come out as gay in an emotional interview where he opened up about his battle with addiction and mental health battle regarding his sexuality. 

Evans, who played 14 games for the Warriors during their tumultuous 2021 campaign while the club was based in Australia, said he had been denying his sexuality since he was 15 and had been subjected to blackmail over it throughout his career. 

The 34-year-old is just the second male player to publicly come out as gay in professional rugby league, following in the footsteps of former Australian international Ian Roberts, while former NRL referee Matt Cecchin has also revealed he is gay. 

Speaking on 100% Footy on Australia’s Channel Nine network, Evans explained that denying his sexuality proved so difficult that he battled addiction issues while planning to end his own life. 

“I had three goals in life,” Evans said. “That was to play NRL, buy my parents a house, and then I wanted to top myself, because I was living in denial from a young age. 

“I know that I’m gay, but I went from every other avenue to build up these walls. To be someone to escape who I am. I still can’t believe I am here talking to you. 

“This is definitely my worst nightmare. But I know if I surrender, it’s just going to be a start to a new life. I’ve been fighting a war within, and it’s not sustainable. I was sleeping in parks, doing drugs, trying to ultimately pass away so I didn’t have to come to this [conversation].” 

Evans said going public about his sexuality takes the power away from those who had blackmailed him during his career and that going public feels “like a weight has lifted off my shoulders”. 

His decision to come out publicly follows a stint in rehabilitation and more than four months of sobriety, which he celebrated on social media in May. 

Kane Evans during his time with the Warriors. Photo / Photosport 

He credited fellow player Joe Galuvao, now manager with the RLPA’s past players and transition programme, for helping him, along with his former Sydney Roosters coach Trent Robinson, with the club assisting with mental health support. 

“I started questioning? ‘Maybe death isn’t the plan for me yet. Maybe I do deserve to go and get help’,” Evans said. 

“I’ve carried [hiding my sexuality] around my whole life. I’m here today to show people that you don’t have to live like that. Even now I feel a bit more free, just by saying it out loud, I’ve brought it to the light. 

“Even over the years when I’ve tried to go down that path [of coming out on my own terms], I’ve had people blackmail me. I’ve had people try to throw me under the bus, I’ve had people try to deflect their problems by trying to out me. And it just built up a lot of shame, and fear and guilt within myself. 

“Now I’ve spoken about it, I’ve shattered all those chains. They’ve lost their power. I feel like coming and speaking to you today, fear, shame, guilt – all of that, I’ve cut ties with all that.” 

At the time the interview was recorded, Evans hadn’t told his parents but said by the time it would air, he would have told them and “feel free”. 

Speaking about his time at the Warriors, Evans said he had lost who he was as a person and took his aggression to a new level, highlighted by several on-field incidents towards the end of the season. 

He was fined $5000 after TV cameras caught him with an obscene message on his wrist tape which read “Fold some c***” for their round-18 match against the Penrith Panthers where he was 18th man. 

Three weeks later, he was sent to the sin bin twice in their win over the Cronulla Sharks, one of those times was for punching an opposing player. 

Then, in a 44-0 defeat to the Gold Coast Titans, Evans was sin-binned again for punching, which led to a five-match ban and ultimately he was released from his contract one year early. 

“I was still chasing my tail trying to find out who I am as a person and as a player,” Evans said. “I took the aggression to another level. 

“It definitely did [come back to bite me]. I ended up getting cut a year early from my contract. I wanted to jump in and physically protect people even when it’s not my fight.” 

Along with the Warriors, Evans also had stints at the Roosters, Parramatta Eels and Hull FC in the Super League. He also played in 13 tests for Fiji, representing them at two World Cups. 

SUICIDE AND DEPRESSION 

Where to get help:
• Lifeline: Call 0800 543 354 or text 4357 (HELP) (available 24/7)
• Suicide Crisis Helpline: Call 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO) (available 24/7)
• Youth services: (06) 3555 906
• Youthline: Call 0800 376 633 or text 234
• What's Up: Call 0800 942 8787 (11am to 11pm) or webchat (11am to 10.30pm)
• 0800 Anxiety Helpline: 0800 269 4389 (0800 ANXIETY). This service is confidential and free of charge. Open 24/7.
• Depression helpline: Call 0800 111 757 or text 4202 (available 24/7)
• Helpline: Need to talk? Call or text 1737
• Aoake te Rā (Bereaved by Suicide Service): Call 0800 000 053
If it is an emergency and you feel like you or someone else is at risk, call 111.

Ben Francis is an Auckland-based reporter for the New Zealand Herald who covers breaking sports news.