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D'Arcy Waldegrave: 'Joe Schmidt is riding into Australia on a mighty Percheron'

Author
D'Arcy Waldegrave,
Publish Date
Sat, 20 Jan 2024, 9:35AM
Former All Blacks assistant coach Joe Schmidt. Photo / Photosport
Former All Blacks assistant coach Joe Schmidt. Photo / Photosport

D'Arcy Waldegrave: 'Joe Schmidt is riding into Australia on a mighty Percheron'

Author
D'Arcy Waldegrave,
Publish Date
Sat, 20 Jan 2024, 9:35AM

Joe Schmidt is riding into Australia on a mighty Percheron. The knight in shining armour, fresh from jousting for the All Blacks has been anointed by Aussie rugby as their new saviour. The hugely successful former Irish coach (conveniently ignoring their continued World Cup black hole) has been tasked with dragging the Wallabies out of the pit that Eddie Jones led them into.

Masochist much?

Plainly Joe is keen on a project. This one hellava project. It will challenge every facet of his revered rugby acumen. He’s got no cattle to work with, a team whose confidence is at an all-time low and a public who has rightly lost interest in the shenanigans of Rugby Australia. It’s a sport on its knees. They are looking squarely down the barrel of an exuberant All Black side, a savage World Champion Springbok team and the Lions waiting at the end of Joe’s tenure to chew up and spit out what's left of the jumping marsupial carcass. 

For a guy who was a hesitant member of the AB staff, essentially dragged into the set up through his friendship with coach Foster, a guy who wanted to breathe in the sweet air of a life without the suffocating mask of coaching internationally, this is one odd decision.  

Granted, it's only a short-term appointment, I’m presuming the lure of reanimating the Ocker rugby corpse is a challenge he couldn’t resist. What success looks like is anyone's guess, but with a team at rock bottom, staying on their feet during the anthem is probably enough to say job well done.  

The key questions here are these: will his appointment add anything to the gelatinous spine of Wallaby Bledisloe exchanges? Will it bring extra energy to Aussie Super sides? Is he another Kiwi born Aussie rugby scapegoat? Will he ever turn up at a press conference? 

I wish him the best and genuinely hope he can do something with the West Island union train smash, thoughts and prayers.  

That'll do.  

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