The mother of a disabled toddler who refused to let medical professionals into her house as her son starved to death pleaded guilty to manslaughter today, just minutes before her jury trial was set to begin. 

Stormy Lee Ryder, 33, had been aware that 19-month-old Tūwharetoa Tahau – who had cerebral palsy resulting from a brain bleed when he was an infant – had been acting oddly in the weeks before his June 2024 death inside their South Auckland home, according to newly released court documents. 

Between early February and his post-mortem exam five months later, his weight had dropped about 27% from 8.53kg to 6.23kg. He was no longer sleeping soundly and had stopped eating all but Weet-Bix and banana yoghurt, and a single bottle a day, Ryder would later tell police, explaining that it had been normal for him previously to drink six to seven bottles. 

Paramedics who attended the scene immediately noticed Tūwharetoa was visibly emaciated, with his ribs showing. 

But despite the troubling signs, Ryder refused to let two Plunket nurses into her Takanini home when they tried to visit the day before the boy’s death. Later that night, she left Tūwharetoa and two siblings, also toddlers, at home without an adult. 

It is not known when she returned, but the agreed summary of facts states she realised Tūwharetoa was “floppy and unresponsive” around 5am the next day. She wouldn’t call 111 until nearly an hour and a half later. 

“You love the gear more than your kids,” Ryder’s own mother had told her via text in an argument two weeks before the child’s death. “Gear” is a common slang term for drugs. 

Ryder’s lower lip quivered at times today as Justice Grant Powell referred to some of the allegations outside the presence of the jury panel. She started the day seated in an area normally reserved for lawyers, having opted to represent herself at trial. 

But she was moved to the glass-enclosed dock, where defendants normally sit, as she changed her plea to guilty. 

Justice Powell set a sentencing date for June, ordering that she remain in custody in the meantime. 

Surprise twin 

Court documents released today outline for the first time how Tūwharetoa had a difficult start to life even before his birth. 

Ryder did not seek antenatal care during her pregnancy and Tūwharetoa, along with his twin sister, were born significantly premature. The defendant had not been aware she was carrying twins. 

Both infants suffered significant complications due to their early births and spent the first five months of their lives in a hospital newborn intensive care unit. 

At two months old, Tūwharetoa suffered another significant setback in the form of a brain bleed and fluid build-up within his brain. If he was lucky enough to survive, the family was told, he’d need long-term care with frequent medical appointments. 

Auckland High Court Justice Grant Powell was set to oversee Stormy Ryder's manslaughter trial before she pleaded guilty at the last minute. He will now oversee her sentencing instead. Photo / Jason Dorday 

“Ms Ryder had significant and extensive community support available to her following the twins’ discharge from hospital,” the agreed summary of facts state. 

“She was aware of, and given training sessions for, Tūwharetoa’s significant feeding challenges [for instance using more energy to feed and requiring assistance]. 

“Upon discharge, the community services available included homecare nurses (Kidz First), a community dietician, a speech and language therapist, a neurodevelopmental therapist, and appointments to see the neurosurgical clinic, the Neonatal clinic, and an ophthalmology appointment.” 

Missed appointments 

Tūwharetoa was diagnosed with cerebral palsy in August 2023, 10 months before his death. It severely affected his development, with reduced vision and limited control along the left side of his body. 

Because of that, community health services remained engaged. 

But getting Ryder to stay engaged was another matter altogether. 

Between April 2023 and February 2024, Ryder took her son to four medical appointments outside their home but didn’t show up for another 13 appointments. 

“Ms Ryder would often have medical appointments rescheduled and then still fail to attend,” the agreed summary of facts states. 

On 24 occasions during that same period, she let visiting healthcare or social workers into her home. However, appointments were either cancelled or visitors were turned away from her home 29 times, and on six other occasions, she would only speak with the visitors outside her home. 

Despite all that, it appeared Tūwharetoa had been making slow but steady progress up until the last time he was weighed, court documents state. 

OT not called in 

Ryder appeared to become even more standoffish with those trying to help her after an incident in April 2024 in which a home care nurse asked police to force their way into the defendant’s home. 

The nurse had seen children in the home but could not get any adults to come to the door. Ryder was later found asleep in the lounge. The house was messy, there was no power and one child had a heavily soiled nappy. 

In the last four months of Tūwharetoa’s life, Ryder took him to one appointment and skipped five others. Of the 19 occasions workers came to her house, they were let inside only five times. 

The situation was bad enough that a group of medical professionals held a meeting to discuss what they should do. 

“Escalation to Oranga Tamariki was considered, recommended, and a referral was made,” court documents state. “However, it was argued against by other staff and placed on hold on the basis that they felt engagement would worsen following a referral. 

“Ultimately, Oranga Tamariki were never engaged with family until after Tūwharetoa’s passing.” 

‘Stop being mean’ 

Court records show that Ryder had become increasingly more isolated in the final month of her son’s life. 

She had split with her partner, who was absent from the home and did not assist with childcare, the agreed facts state. And her mother, who had previously visited twice a week to help out, got fed up and stopped coming in early June. 

“stop being mean to your kidz I feel sorry for the twins your house has an ugly feeling in it I’m not coming anymore,” Ryder’s mother told her in a text later recovered by police. 

Around 10am on June 26, the day before the child’s death, two Plunket nurses showed up and asked to visit with the children. 

Ryder, who was hanging clothes outside, said it wasn’t a good day for a visit. 

Records obtained from rideshare app Uber show she left the home at 10.59pm that same day. Her children were left at home. She withdrew $120 and just after midnight messaged a private Facebook drug chat group named “Gotwhat ya Need” before deleting the message 10 minutes later. 

She dialled 111 at 6.23am to report her son’s unresponsiveness, after first noticing him around 5am. 

There was plenty of formula in the cupboard, police would later observe. 

The child’s cause of death was later determined to have been complications from starvation and dehydration. Cerebral palsy was deemed a condition contributing to the death, but not related to the disease or condition causing it. 

Craig Kapitan is an Auckland-based journalist covering courts and justice. He joined the Herald in 2021 and has reported on courts since 2002 in three newsrooms in the US and New Zealand.