Alcohol, it seems, is front and centre in the majority of the misconduct issues investigated by New Zealand rugby.

This is the respect and responsibility review that was commissioned off the back of the Chiefs' end of season party where a woman alleged she was assaulted and had beer and gravel thrown at her.

The review looked at 36 cases of misconduct over the past four years.

And let me just say at this point that New Zealand rugby is to be commended for this review. Yes, it took a while to get here, but the panel was independent and thorough - a top notch group of people.

I'm going to focus on one aspect of this review and that's in relation to alcohol because this is the aspect that doesn't sit well with me. The over-riding blame that's placed on alcohol. And we speak about the need to get on top of our booze culture. It's the drinking that leads to a person or a player's downfall. That's the problem. It's the booze.

Now, alcoholics anonymous will tell you that one of the first steps towards progress is owning and accepting your actions. Don't blame the alcohol. You did what you did. Take responsibility for your actions. Alcohol may have fuelled your desires or your poor decision-making, but it was you that did this. It was you that spat at a woman. Or groped her. Or felt it was your right to touch her or speak to her in the way that you did.

That wasn't the booze. That was you.

And I would argue that men who are exploitive, aggressive or manipulative towards women when they're drunk, also harbour those same thoughts when they're sober. It's just that alcohol diminishes their self-control and that's why they act....Often with horrendous consequences. Often leaving a woman in a worse state then what he found her.

So if you blame the alcohol, you're missing the point. The issue is far deeper then that. The issue relates to how some men perceive women and the role of women in society. And that starts at a very young age. There are many factors that influence a young man's development and what shapes his view of women. It comes down to parenting. Schooling. Access to porn. That's a big one. And we're not talking about playboy magazine. We're talking about hard core porn on the net. And social media too. The list goes on.

If it's just alcohol that's led to these moments of madness, these acts of misconduct, then why isn't every man predatory when he's drunk? The answer is because it's not the booze. You can't blame the sexual objectification of women on alcohol.

But what rugby and the rugby culture gives us is a snapshot into society.

Yes, there are some fine, fine young men out there, but there are some who are abusive, sexist, predatory and misogynistic.

And how do you stop that? Telling them to ease up on the booze won't change their deeply embedded views. To do that we need to look far deeper at how we live our lives today and who and what is shaping the views and perceptions of young New Zealand men.