The days of simple kids' birthday parties with fairy bread and a small packet of lollies to take home may be over.

Nib's State of the Nation Parenting survey suggests 43 percent of Kiwi parents feel pressure to keep up with other families when it comes to birthday parties.

Forty percent would spend above their means on birthday parties.

Parenting expert Nathan Wallis told Tim Dower kids still love games like musical chairs and pin the tail on the donkey.

He says it's not that those things are gone, it's just that the list of what makes a good party has been added to and added to.

"Kids still love the traditional games we all played like musical chairs and pin the tail on the donkey. Those games are still there, its just more games are being invented and added to the list."

Wallis says parents don't feel they spend enough time with their children so want to compensate by sometimes going over the top.